We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
