Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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