I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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