Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I look better un-naked...
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize