I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
