I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
