He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Randomize
