My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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