My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
