i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize