We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
