ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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