I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
