I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Randomize
