I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
