I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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