I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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