Have you finally orgasmed yet?
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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