Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
