i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Alive.
So much puke
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
