he puts the penis in happiness.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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