playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
