She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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