I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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