Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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