Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
