i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
only if we run a train.
done.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
