I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Randomize
