Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize