I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
