is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
