I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
