So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
