I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
So much rum. So many feels.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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