Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
