More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
