matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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