I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Randomize
