She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
