I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
