a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
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