last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
