Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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