she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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