Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
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