sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
