like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
