..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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