wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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