Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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