Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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