So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
