Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
That accounts for only three of the penises
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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